Accidentally murdered brother in a selfish revenge attempt!

As you should of already read on Lancaster online. My dear brother Tim Schulze tried to shrink my head in an attempt to use toxic waste! Little did he know it just mad my head bigger and made him even smaller!! “Didn’t know you could get any smaller” So as I am so proudly strutting myself “cuz u know I love myself” to gloat in his failure! As I stepped inside of our house I tripped and fell “you know a Lil top heavy!” I accidentally squashed his little oompah loompa ass and my beloved brother is no longer with us! However he was in a contract bind with “Charlie and the chocolate factory” so I am looking for someone to finish out his contract as their “gay oompah loomp” I will make you proud brother! But no one can play ur role better then you!!!!!