Sam Francis, a young black upwardly mobile professional, discusses his obsession with Rae Sremmurd’s hit song “Swang”.
Often caught singing the lyrics of the chorus in a god awful annoyingly high pitchy falsetto:
“Hop out, drop, top, fuck y’all talkin’ I need it right now
Cash in the air, yeah, what goes up gotta come down…”
When asked about what it meant to “Swang”, Francis stated that the song was very inspirational because it allowed him to finally feel good about having a small penis; hence why he loves singing it in his high pitched falsetto.
“I can now “Swang” all ova the place… nothing beats the feeling of coming home from a hard day’s work and letting my small penis out of my compression underwear. Sometimes I Swang my small penis all over my new spacious home…it’s quite liberating actually.”
When asked about the possible backlash he may receive for finally admitting his penis doesn’t quite stack up he said, “penis ain’t nothing but a number…..and girthiness ain’t nothing but a thang….my penis is just as big as my thumb…and we all know how important the opposable thumb is…your hands wouldn’t be functional without it.”