Jamestown Woman Arrested

Alysia Nash, 22, arrested in Clarendon, P.A. for breaking and entering into peoples homes at night to tickle their buttholes and steal their douches. Last seen on camera passing Kondaks store with tampons in her nose, and wearing nothing but a diaper. She is considered armed and dangerous, with a giant two headed black dildo, and reports say she is using it like a baseball bat, it does smell like fecal matter.