Local hero reluctantly accepts ‘Tiniest Penis Award’

After what some consider as a “total violation of privacy” the votes were tallied and in a landslide victory, Ryan “tugboat” Baney, stole the title of tiniest penis from four time reigning champ Max Costanzo. Baney, who we assume is passed out from sheer elation, could not be reached for comment. His runner up had these kind words to say, “I’m real happy for him, he had what it took and trained harder than anyone I’ve ever known. It takes a lot of guts and a little penis to push yourself that hard”. Inspiring