Natchez Native Buys Devil’s Punchbowl, Plans Chick-fil-A

A native of Natchez has purchased the land known as the Devil’s Punchbowl and his plans involve building a Chick-fil-A restaurant in that location. Known historically as a place of banditry and hellish atrocities, the Devil’s Punchbowl is ripe for a facelift and a new purpose according to the buyer, Richard Moroney, currently of Huntsville, Alabama.

Speaking to Channel 23 News, Moroney stated “We don’t want to end up like Rodney, Mississippi. Just look at that place- it’s a huge disaster!” Moroney went on to elaborate on his plans which include the construction of a massive levee and the transport of dirt from Emerald Mound into the Devil’s Punchbowl.

The Natchez Society for the Preservation of History, the Mississippi Department of Artifacts and Archives, and many other organizations and concerned citizens are raising “Hell” over the move which Moroney maintains is a necessary step toward making Natchez great again. “People are mad about my efforts to obtain Emerald Mound’s dirt, but it makes perfect sense. It’s the kind of loess soil we need for stability. Nobody visits Emerald Mound anyway, and the steps were rotting out the last I checked.”

If Chick-fil-A approves Moroney’s suggestions, the new restaurant will offer some new menu items which would be unique to the Devil’s Punchbowl location: the “Chicken & Deviled Ham Deluxe”, the “Horned Beast on Rye”, and new desserts including “Devil’s Food Cake”. And since Chick-fil-A is known for their lemonade, now customers can request- you guessed it- “Devil’s Punch”! All combo meals will be priced $6.66.

Moroney has already ordered gold-plated tridents instead of shovels for the groundbreaking ceremony which, once all negotiations and approvals are complete, should take place on April 1, 2018 with the grand opening scheduled for later in the year on October 31.